“I’ll always remember when my fellow inmates were sent off to die”

After five years in Evin Prison, journalist and human rights activist Mehdi Khodaei was released in July 2015. But he still clearly remembers the day of his arrest: March 2, 2010 at midnight.

“I was leaving home on an errand when I noticed the security agents,” Khodaei recalls. “They were looking for my house. They identified me from a photograph they had, and told me they wanted to talk to me for a few minutes.”

He knew he was about to be arrested; the same had happened to his friends before.

Khodaei was charged with “activities against national security” and “propaganda against the regime.” He spent the next 10 months at Evin Prison’s Ward 2A controlled by the Revolutionary Guards, after which he was transferred to the communal Ward 350. When civil rights activist Haleh Sahabi and journalist Hoda Saber died in prison, Khodaei was among the 12 prisoners in Ward 350 who went on hunger strike. As a result, they were denied regular furlough.

Journalism Is Not A Crime talked to Mehdi Khodaei about his sudden arrest, what it was like to watch fellow inmates be sent off to be executed, and how he managed to stay sane throughout 58 days in solitary confinement and five years in Iran’s most notorious prison.

 

Can you describe what happened when you were arrested?

In the car on the way to prison the agents started a conversation with me, which was a kind of preliminary interrogation. I stated a few times that my human rights activities and my work for [the reformist presidential candidate Mehdi] Karroubi was in accordance with the constitution. Quite surprisingly, one of the agents in the car said, “then someone has framed you.”

Considering the length of my friends’ imprisonment, I was sure I was going to spend much longer time in detention than I did after my arrest in 2008 [38 days]. I had prepared for a minimum of three months. On the way to prison, I watched the scenes outside the car window. I wanted to remember as many of them as possible, so I could visualize them in solitary confinement. I was kind of proud of myself because I felt that my social activities had been effective.

 

How long were you in solitary confinement and how did you get through it?

I spent 58 days in solitary confinement at Evin’s Ward 2A, and another seven months in semi-solitary confinement. In 2008, I was kept in solitary confinement for 38 days, and this experience helped make my second time there more bearable.

The most painful thing about solitary confinement is the mental confusion and the inability to manage time. I tried to stay active both mentally and physically by reviewing memories from my past, reciting poetry, creating mental visualizations, reading notes left on the walls, exercising, trying to contact inmates in other cells and so on.

 

What concerns did you have at the time?

The most worrying thing was not having any news about my family. I had no information about the health of my parents, and I was trying with all my strength to keep my spirits high.

Another thing that pained me was the pressure on my friends. On the night of my arrest, more than 30 of my friends – all human rights activists – were arrested as well. Among them were some Baha’is [a religious minority in Iran] who, aside from the harsh interrogations, were treated in a very humiliating way in prison. The guards had announced that the Baha’is were unclean, which meant they had to shower in a separate stall and dry their laundry on a separate rack. They even had to use different pens. This treatment created a very painful psychological situation.

 

What kinds of mental and psychological pressure did you suffer in prison?

After being transferred to the communal ward, the conditions improved for a short while. But as time went on, the pressure and restrictions on political prisoners increased – from disconnected phone calls to limitations on personal meetings, and being practically deprived of furloughs.

While solitary confinement has its challenges, the conditions in the communal ward are totally different because you are affected directly by other prisoners’ behavior. When a friend was not given a furlough to go to the funeral of a beloved, the whole ward was upset and sad. Or when an inmate’s family was traveling from far away to visit the prison in Tehran, we were all worried about them getting home safely. Happy times and sad times were directly shared among the prisoners, which in the long term became very hard to manage.

 

What were the most difficult moments in prison?

Before going to prison, my friends and I had done some work to prevent the execution of people condemned to death. But until I witnessed the execution of a fellow inmate from close up, I had not fully grasped the terrifying depth of this penalty.

For me, the most difficult moments in prison were when I heard about the execution of a cellmate. During my years in prison, four prisoners from my cell were executed. I don’t think I can ever forget the moments we said our goodbyes.

I experienced the most bitter and terrifying moments of my life in that period. I really couldn’t believe that someone, with whom I might just have had a conversation about weekend book readings, was suddenly being executed. It might seem ridiculous, but for quite a while I thought they would return after they had served their sentence, like when fellow inmates were transferred to solitary confinement and then returned after some time. I even dreamed that they had returned and that we had resumed our conversations. As a human rights activist I knew about the death penalty, but I had no idea about the depth of the tragedy. I hope I’ll never have to witness such events ever again.

 

You wrote a book while in prison. How were you able to think about writing when you were under so much pressure?

In prison, time management and planning is vital. At Ward 350 we set up classes taught by fellow inmates who specialized in fields such as journalism, human rights, political science, law and foreign languages. I conducted a course on “human rights discourse.” We had weekly meetings about subjects brought up by prisoners in the ward.

As time went by and prison officials imposed restrictions on our classes, many inmates took to translating. That was when I came up with the idea of translating a book about human rights. After consulting with my dear friend in prison, Omid Kokabee, I decided to translate Atlas of Human Rights [a 2010 book by Andrew Fagan] into Persian, and Omid took the trouble of checking my translation with the original.

I chose Atlas of Human Rights because it presents the reader with very important and high-level information and concepts on human rights issues in a very accessible way by using maps and charts. I also wrote the book Multiple Approaches to Human Rights in Iran, and wrote a research paper on the physical and psychological effects of solitary confinement. I hope they will be published soon.

 

What impact does prison have on a person?

The most important point that I must mention is the long-term negative effects of solitary confinement, interrogations and imprisonment on the psyche of the prisoner. During my imprisonment I studied this subject. The most critical problem that prisoners encounter after prison is post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and I believe prisoners must seek treatment for this syndrome. Many prisoners experience social withdrawal, distress, nightmares and depression, which necessitate consulting with a psychiatrist.

 

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