“Bond” tells the journey of Sina and Negar, a story of love, resilience, and transformation, narrated by Negar, the wife of Sina, an Iranian trans man.
Their story is one of a long and winding journey to reach the love they have for each other. They now live in Canada, having faced a difficult start after immigrating and building a life far from their homeland, which has become their new home.
A new home for the same love - a love that has been deeply “bonded” in their hearts for years.
I had known Sina for years through social media. He was perhaps the first Iranian trans man to share his daily life on Instagram to raise awareness in society. At that time, it was rare to find a trans person in Iran who dared to speak and write openly about themselves.
Hearing about their love story from Negar stirred new emotions in me—a shared feeling, a shared pain among all trans people living in a society like Iran. Negar’s choked voice and trembling tone when she speaks of the difficult days and moments of the past reflect the depth of the painful experiences that an ignorant society imposed on her and her husband.
They first met at university as classmates. At that time, Sina still wore clothes traditionally associated with women. One memory Negar recalls from those days is that, as they lived in the same dormitory, they agreed to return together after class. But Negar forgot about the arrangement and left Sina behind. This is one of the first memories she recalls of their relationship.
Negar didn’t know anything - neither about Sina nor about trans people. One day, she noticed an image of a three-colored flag - white, pink, and blue - on Sina’s laptop. She asked, “Where is this flag from?” Sina responded, “Go and find out for yourself.” Negar searched on Google and, for the first time, became familiar with the term “trans.”
Their relationship continued until Sina invited her over and told her everything about himself and his being trans. Negar was shocked, particularly by Sina’s decision to undergo all the surgeries necessary to reach his true identity. That same night, Sina expressed his love for her and proposed they enter into a relationship, but Negar needed more time to think.
In the end, Negar decided to stand by Sina on this difficult journey, but the challenges weren’t limited to the hospital, the operating room, and the waiting. After each surgery, the long and painful recovery periods were overwhelming. Negar went to work while Sina lost his job due to his transition.
They had no one with them. They hadn’t told anyone, and they were completely alone - just the two of them. The situation was extremely difficult. It felt as though they had lost everything. Sina had to start from scratch, and it was very tough for him. It was even harder for Negar.
Seeing all those days, all that hardship, seeing the one she loved in such a state was sometimes beyond what Negar could bear. They had many good and bad days, but they gave each other time, learned from each other, and helped each other move forward.
During those days, Sina repeatedly proposed marriage, but Negar wasn’t sure - not because she wasn’t sure about Sina, but because she wasn’t sure if she wanted to get married at all. She needed time. Their families didn’t know; no one knew anything.
But in the end, love worked its magic.
Negar accepted Sina’s proposal. Now, they have left their home behind and live in a different corner of the world - freer, more liberated, and far from the judgments and fears that might never have left them in Iran. Now, the bond between Sina and Negar has truly blossomed.
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